So, some time this afternoon, Akismet stopped the 10,000th spam comment here at Complaint Hub.  I think we should all take a moment and applaud Akismet's efforts.  Way to go, Akismet!

levitra, from IP Address 202.105.182.15, decided to ask, "How add your to reds?".  That was the comment.  The link to "levitra's" blog or website was some Ukrainian top level domain name.  I'm sure the site is wonderful and informative.  I imagine they sell cheap pharmaceuticals.

I often wonder why they think that someone will take a comment like that seriously and click on "levitra's" website to find out more.  And then, once there, do they really expect that people will think, "Oh, while I'm here, I should buy prescription medicine from a foreign country without the advice of my doctor!"

Seriously.  At least I didn't have to censor the comment for language.

My Akismet spam filter on the comments here at Complaint Hub has been letting me down lately. In general, it has been fantastic. It's caught about 8,000 spam comments since I started the site, and only caught maybe three or four real posts. But lately it has been holding more and more spam comments in moderation, emailing me and making me tell it that the comment is spam.

Some of what it's been letting through are quite obviously spam. The latest was a brief message and then forty links to hardcore porn.

I hope this means that Akismet is just nearing the next step in their release cycle, and the spammers are getting better at fooling the filter, but all will be back to normal soon. I hate captchas, and don't ever want to use one here, so a filter like Akismet is a necessity.

If Dante were writing The Inferno today, what circle of Hell do you think he'd put the spammers into? I'd throw them into the Eighth circle with the panderers (a person who serves or caters to the vulgar passions or plans of others (especially in order to make money [source]). There they would walk in a line, being whipped by demons. That seems appropriate.

A friend recently gave me opportunity to discover that if you leave a comment under the name "Balls", you are likely to be marked as spam by WordPress and Akismet.  Since I rarely ever see real comments marked as spam, I don't usually watch them very carefully, and your comment is not likely to appear on the site.

Finally a response from the Kennedy Center to my complaints.

[Dear Cherished Patron,]

       We have manually removed you from our e-mail list. You shouldn't be receiving any e-mail from us regarding anything aside from shows for which you have purchased tickets. If you do receive anymore unwanted e-mail, please feel free to get in touch with me and I'll do my best to fix the problem. I apologize for your inconvenience.

Sincerely,

[Some dude]

Electronic Media Intern

So, all I had to do was complain to the FTC.  I would have appreciated an explanation of why they thought it was okay to violate the CAN-SPAM act, but maybe that's too much to ask.  Maybe they could have told me why I had to complain three times before I got a response. 

Well, at least they responded.

I filed a complaint with the FTC about the spam.  I'm sure that's just as pointless as complaining about a Do Not Call violation, but it makes me feel better.

I was searching through my Gmail spam folder, looking for names for the characters in my Script Frenzy screenplay, and I came across this surreal piece of art. I'm pretty sure that the sender, Rosanna RODGERS, didn't intend for me to see the beauty in this piece (Which I reproduce nearly as she sent it, just with some line breaks to really give it some pop). She probably wanted me to buy generic Cialis or Tramadol or go see naked Russian teens or something.

steel the bee
see business on sea
it's root in sharp in tree
see grip it bucket it wide not match!
stage but card see complete!
moon but money it breath the left!
sharp!
thought be jump or person in warm it purpose but shock a liquid

approval see
feeble be open may join on married in pencil some rub it's pin be attention it kiss it's credit!
hope be thumb and behavior try harbour may door but straight
error or glove in healthy not town on chief try design on medical be tray the angry the

bulb see heat on bath it's leather be tired and hammer be pleasure some hammer be pot it jump some material!
selection or complex , laugh try cough!
probable a key a chain and cover see necessary
street be drink see delicate!
approval try train, knot it's

I'm not a big fan of poetry, but in my book, this is right up there with Poe's "The Raven".

I've had an Akismet spam filter on the comments here since right after I started the site last August.  It's caught about 1500 spam comments in that time.  However, 600 of them are from the last three days, all with the same text in the comment.  It's driving me insane.  A couple of them have even gotten through into my comment moderation queue.  Akismet has been great, but these people are relentless.  And I don't get it - they have the same misspelling in each of the comments.  I don't know why they misspell words.  Surely they must know that it tips off spam filters because all spammers seem to do it.  And I know many of them may not be native English speakers, but not using a spell checker seems strange.

Anyway, I hope all spammers get to spend eternity in a special hell where they must constantly read advertisements every time they try to do anything.  The ads can only be for mortgage refinancing, viagra, phone sex, and fake designer handbags.

Just opened my email box this morning to an email from American Airlines!  After all, it's only been a week, why wouldn't they have emailed me by now?

But it was just spam about their AAdvantage program.  Alas.  They had better get back to me soon.  My mouse moves ever closer to the "Click here to file a complaint with the Better Business Bureau" button.

I've just activated Akismet, which is supposed to help prevent comment spam.  If you enter a comment that doesn't show up for a few days (I moderate all comments until you've had one approved, so it won't show up right away), email me and let me know.  If your comment actually is spam, then please go play in traffic on the highway.